I’ve made a fine mess of this summer so far…

Well, I’m just a fantastic boyfriend… yeah, right. I’ve made my girlfriend think she’s ruined my life and our relationship, I can’t cheer up, I keep bringing her back down when she’s cheered up. Her mom’s making her get a summer job, which is going to limit us seeing each other a lot, because we live two hours away from one another. She wants me to get a job so she doesn’t feel alone, but if I get a job too, that’ll limit us even more, plus I doubt I’ll be able to get a job. I’m a pathetic seventeen-year-old who can’t even get his license. I don’t know what she sees me, especially right now. I caused another fight between us today by being a total ass and feeling sorry for myself… again. I probably also ruined her time with her friends. She has so much to keep her mind busy and occupied, while all I do is mope around and think about all of this. She agreed that I was being an ass, which didn’t help, because now I’m scared that she’s going to leave me. It really doesn’t help that she hasn’t talked to me for about two hours now. I figured out why my ex would ignore me… I mope around and become depressed all the time, and I’m just fucking pathetic. This summer is just awful so far, and my family doesn’t help at all. They just make all of this worse.

Caitlyn, if you read this, I’m sorry and I understand if you don’t want to be with me anymore… I just want you to know that I love you, and I’m sorry I’m so pathetic and can’t cheer up or do anything helpful…